He Used to Be, He is
by funkirican
Summary: A letter of sorts from Sakura. Since this is a short story I don't want to put too much into the summary. Quick read. :)


He used to be a wimp, emotional; he would cry over the smallest of things, such as his brother not playing with him that day or getting a scrape on the knee when he did.

He is now strong and powerful; he went out in search of his own personal sensei, someone whom would be able to train him so that he could reach his goals.

He used to care somewhat; while on missions he would always protect me, even if it meant injury to himself.

He no longer cares; his eyes are eyes of hate. Every time I look into them I see the darkness, the loneliness, the need of revenge that he has allowed to consume him.

He used to be short and adorable; every girl wanted him while we were children, myself included. I remember fighting over him with the other girls, mostly Ino-Pig.

He is now tall and handsome; even with the dark, even with the hate and the want...no the _need _to kill, I can't help but step back and admire how handsome he has turned out to be. His dark onyx eyes and jet black hair with his pale complexion compliment his personality, then again, that makes since with how dark and empty his soul has become.

He used to have virgin lips; Naruto took care of that. I remember hating Naruto for it, every girl did really. Granted it was an accident, but that still didn't save Naruto the heat of my fist.

He is now searching; searching for a strong kunoichi to help him repopulate his clan. I highly doubt Naruto has been his only kiss.

He used to be a comrade, a friend; he used to be a part of team Kakashi, or team seven really. With his quick mind and ability to copy juitsu, he was a valuable asset. With the way he would conspire with Naruto and I to see Kakashi-sensei's face, he was a friend-one of the best, really.

He is now the enemy; he allowed his sensei, one of the legendary Sanin to take over his very soul, he isn't the boy we knew, he is now a different man-a complete stranger.

I remember when he and I passed the bell test and Naruto failed; only we had all failed, then passed- our sensei was a complicated, aloof man. Naruto was tied to the stump in the middle and to starve while we enjoyed our lunch on the stumps on either side of him. This was when he used to be somewhat caring. He was the first to offer Naruto the food that we weren't supposed to feed him. I protested, I knew we shouldn't have done it. But then again, I ended up following his example anyway, he did after all hold my affections. Our sensei showed up right as Naruto took the bite off my chopsticks, and man were we doomed. Well, not really, that was when we were told that we passed.

I remember the chunin exams when you made me promise not to tell anyone of your curse mark. In the very pit of my being I knew that was a bad choice and the wrong course of action, but I couldn't bring myself to tell you that. All I ever wanted from you were your affections, and if I didn't do what you said, I knew that I would never receive them. The thought killed a part of me, so I followed along with your desires and in the process you went through a lot of unnecessary pain.

I remember when you and Kakashi-sensei came back from about a month of training, you had a new outfit then, all black and it suited you quite well. We thought you were strong before, but when you came back you seemed all powerful; of course as the years have passed we have each surpassed how powerful you were then, at that time. But still, the amount of progress you had made in a month was simply remarkable and admirable back then...Just as the progress you had made up until now all these years.

I remember when you left the village- Oh how I begged you not to go! I cried and pleaded and even asked you to bring me along, but still you left. You left me alone. You took my heart-the heart that beats only for you- and threw it on the ground before thoroughly stomping on it repeatedly. I remember feeling empty for a moment and at that time I idly wondered if that was how you felt all the time. During those thoughts you somehow ended behind me, it was the first time that you thanked me for anything. Then I was out and I remember nothing but waking up on a bench in the morning-you were long gone by then.

I closed my diary that ended up turning into a letter somewhere along the way. "I finished writing all of my feelings for you a couple of years ago." I looked down at the half breathing man before me. Naruto was kneeling down beside him, they were hand in hand even though he was the one that took down our former teammate.

Sasuke looked me in the eyes, his weren't the red sharingon we became accustomed to. Instead they were the black onyx of our earlier years, it made the emotions momentarily come back. "What...did the...end...ing say?" His breathing was becoming more labored by the minute, something that pained me.

"I cannot tell you yet, I have a question first." He gave a small nod for me to continue, talking was becoming a hassle-time was limited. "Why did you allow Naruto's attack to hit you, you had plenty of time to dodge." Well, I had meant for it to be a question, it was more of an observation really.

Even though I know it to be impossible, I saw the boyish smirk from our genin days grace his face. "I...need..ed to go...My time...done." I tapped my foot in impatience with the dying man on the ground before me. "Sakura...I comp...leted..my task...I, want to...go h..ome. To..you.."

I jumped in surprise and felt my team leader place his hand on my shoulder, my sensei was always there for me. "I don't understand."

"I love..you..I ha..ve since...kids...But had...to...revenge.." His onyx eyes became even darker as death clouded over. I watched as his breathing stopped all together. Not a single tear left my eyes as I saw Naruto cry and hug our former comrade. I had almost no feelings, how was I supposed to feel after being told by the love of my life that he always loved me...that we could have been together had he just gotten his head out of his ass. Naruto concluded his grieving and pushed me forward towards the idiot who just threw his life away instead of even trying to fix it. Without a thought I threw my diary gone note down to his chest, "Kakashi-sensei, I need a favor."

Said man stepped back to my side and gave a short hum in response, "I need you to burn his body."

There were protests in the background from Naruto, Sai continued to hold him back, thankfully as Kakashi gave me a short nod of his head. "I understand, we can't bring him back to the village anyway. This is the closest they would be willing to give him to a grave as is." Kakashi kneeled down to take Sasuke's sword from his side before throwing it to Naruto, "A memento, it's yours now."

The hand signs were quick and precise and before I knew it the body was burning and turning to ash. Once all evidence of his existence was gone we left the depressing site to go back home. We were quiet until we reached the gate, Sai was the first to speak. "Sakura, why did you burn your diary with him." I paused and looked to each of my current teammates.

"I feel nothing. I left my feelings with him so that I can move on."

Nobody had a anything to say and we each went our respected paths. As I opened the door to my apartment I felt a smile pull at the corners of my lips, _I'm free._


End file.
